Lance
Wagner's Commentary
This poem is Raychel's
play either on or against the 14 Stations of the Cross. I did
not understand this the first time I heard it. Only the notes
from her notebook gave me an indication as to the complexity of her
intent. I will give you a line-by-line interpretation of Crushed
(Crush) against the Stations of the Cross (Cross).
Line 1
Cross - Jesus is condemned to death.
Crush - Your ritual
beatings are an unholy crime,
Analysis - Raychel compares the regular beatings by her parents
to Roman crucifixion.
Line 2
Cross - Jesus bears his Cross.
Crush - But my punishment will be cured by time.
Analysis - Raychel "bears her cross" with the
knowledge that one day she will run away.
Line 3
Cross - Jesus falls the first time.
Crush - The first fist’s force sends me sprawling,
Analysis - Obvious.
Line 4
Cross - Jesus meets his Holy Mother.
Crush - For a mother’s intercession I begin calling.
Analysis - Raychel's mother, unlike the Holy Mother, is either
away or hiding from the abuse caused by Raychel's father.
Line 5
Cross - Simon of Cyrene helps Jesus to carry the cross.
Crush - Brother remains helpless at the top of the stair,
Analysis - Like line 4, David Vanderhoff fails to act with the
courage of Simon to lighten Raychel's load, or intervene in any
method.
Line 6
Cross - Jesus and Veronica.
Crush - And blood stains the skirt of the dress that I wear.
Analysis - Veronica gave Jesus her veil to wipe away the blood
from his face. In Crushed, having no assistance, Raychel's dress
acts as Veronica's veil.
Line 7
Cross - Jesus falls a second time.
Crush - I’m picked up and dealt a second crushing blow,
Analysis - Obvious.
Line 8
Cross - Jesus comforts the women of Jerusalem.
Crush - My head fills with vengeance you will never know.
Analysis - Raychel's vengeful thoughts to herself contrast with
the comfort Jesus gives to the women of Jerusalem.
Line 9
Cross - Jesus falls a third time.
Crush - A third painful smack find me dead on the wood,
Analysis - Obvious.
Line 10
Cross - Jesus is stripped of His garments and given gall to
drink.
Crush - While I feel my mouth filling with an ocean of blood.
Analysis - The result of Raychel's beating is directly carried
over to the Roman soldier forcing Jesus to drink gall.
Line 11
Cross - Jesus is nailed to the Cross.
Crush
- I’m swept up and feel myself being carried
/
To my bed,
Analysis - To Raychel, the bed is the equivalent of the
Cross. Perhaps sleep equals death.
Line 12
Cross - Jesus dies.
Crush - when I know I should have been buried.
Analysis - Obvious.
Line 13
Cross - Jesus is taken from the Cross and laid in Mary's arms.
Crush - Brother comes sneaking
Analysis - David Vanderhoff finally comes into the scene after
being safe away from the father's violent temper.
Line 14
Cross - Jesus is laid in the tomb.
Crush - while I remain seething in / Humiliation at
feeling I just let you win.
Analysis - Raychel differentiates her beating from the
Passion by showing herself having fallen in humiliation instead of
rising in glory.
